lunes, 26 de enero de 2009

varias cosas divertidas

NO ES LO MISMO un metro de encaje negro que un negro te encaje un metro
NO ES LO MISMO Hacerlo a baño de María que hacérselo a María en el baño
NO ES LO MISMO El cura Melchor lo hizo que cúrame el chorizo
NO ES LO MISMO Juan Montenegro que te monte el negro Juan
NO ES LO MISMO Blancas bolas de nieve que Blanca Nieves en bolas
NO ES LO MISMO Que un negro llegue primero a la meta que te la meta el primer negro que llegue
NO ES LO MISMO La verdura que verla dura
NO ES LO MISMO Una culebrilla negra que una negra que le brilla el culo
NO ES LO MISMO Dos tazas de te que dos tetazas
NO ES LO MISMO Paquita vete arriba y pon al fresco este besugo que Paquita vete arriba y ponte fresca que ya subo
NO ES LO MISMO una bola negra que una negra en bolas
NO ES LO MISMO un gato montes que te monte un gato
NO ES LO MISMO estar jodido que estar jodiendo
NO ES LO MISMO Las ruinas de Machu Pichu que venga un Macho te meta el Pichu y te deje en ruinas
NO ES LO MISMO meter la bola negra 8 que te la metan 8 negros en bolas
NO ES LO MISMO los montes de Tapachula que tápate los montes chula
NO ES LO MISMO el Consulado General de Chile que el general con su chile de lado
NO ES LO MISMO huele a traste que atrás te huele
NO ES LO MISMO Emeterio Saturnino Zacarias y Fajardo que meterlo sacarlo sacudirlo y guardarlo
NO ES LO MISMO huevos a la besamel que besame los huevos
NO ES LO MISMO Subir al pináculo de una montaña que subir la montaña con un pino en el culo

No es lo mismo Mentasilicato de Potasio que Métase un Alicate por el Culo despacio

EL PLACER DE CAGAR ........

> de los Placeres sin pecar,
> el más dulce es el cagar.
> Con un periódico extendido
> y un cigarrillo encendido
> queda el culo complacido y la mierda en su lugar.
>
> Cagar es un placer;
> de cagar nadie se escapa,
> caga el rey, caga el papa, caga el buey, caga la vaca,
> y hasta la señorita más guapa hace sus bolitas de caca.
> Viene el perro y lo huele,
> viene el gato y lo tapa.
>
> Total, en este mundo de caca
> de cagar nadie se escapa.
> Que triste es amar sin ser amado,
> pero más triste es cagar sin haber almorzado.
>
> Hay cacas blancas por hepatitis,
> las hay blandas por gastritis.
>
> Cualquiera que sea la causa que siempre te alcanza,
> aprieta las piernas duro que cuando el trozo es seguro,
> aunque esté bien fruncido el culo
> sera por lo menos, ¡¡pedo seguro!!
> No hay placer más exquisito,
> que cagar bien despacito.
>
> El baño no es tobogán ni tampoco subibaja.
> El baño es para cagar
> y no pa' hacerse una paja.
>
> Los escritores de baño
> son poetas de ocasión
> que buscan entre la mierda
> su fuente de inspiración.
>
> Vos que os creéis sagaz y de todo os reís,
> decidme si sois capaz de cagar y no hacer pis.
> En este lugar sagrado, adonde tanta gente acude,
> la chica se pasa el dedo y el tipo se lo sacude.
> Caga tranquilo, caga sin pena,
> pero no se te olvide tirar de la cadena.
>
> El tipo que aquí se sienta y de escribir versos se acuerda,
> ¡no me vengan a decir que no es un poeta de mierda!
> En este lugar sagrado donde acude tanta gente,
> hace fuerza el más cobarde y se caga el más valiente.

INESTABLE : Mesa norteamericana de Ines.

ENVERGADURA : Lugar de la anatomía humana donde se colocan los condones.

ONDEANDO : Onde estoy.

CAMARÓN : Aparato enorme que saca fotos.

DECIMAL : Pronunciar equivocadamente.

BECERRO : Que ve u observa una loma o colina.

BERMUDAS : Observar a las que no hablan.

TELEPATÍA : Aparato de TV para la hermana de mi mamá.

TELÓN : Tela de 50 metros … o más.

ANÓMALO : Hemorroides.

BERRO : Bastor Alebán.

BARBARISMO : Colección exagerada de muñecas barbie.

POLINESIA : Mujer Policía que no entiende razones.

CHINCHILLA : Auchenchia de un lugar para chentarche.

DIADEMAS : Veintinueve de febrero.

DILEMAS : Háblale más.

MANIFIESTA : Juerga de cacahuetes.

MEOLLO : Me escucho.

TOTOPO : Mamamífero ciciego dede pepelo nenegro que cocome frifrijoles.

ATIBORRARTE : Desaparecerte.

CACAREO : Excremento del preso.

CACHIVACHE : Pequeño hoyo en el pavimento que está a punto de convertirse en vache.

ELECCIÓN : Lo que expelimenta un chino al vel una película polno.

ENDOSCOPIO : Me preparo para todos los exámenes excepto para dos.

NITRATO : Ni lo intento.

NUEVAMENTE : Cerebro sin usar.

TALENTO : No ta rápido.

ESGUINCE : Uno más gatorce.

ESMALTE : Ni lune ni miélcole.

SORPRENDIDA : Monja en llamas

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